Monday - Royal Gorge Rafting and Ziplining

Today was definitely our longest and most ambitious of days--so our apologies for a short post because it's late and we're exhausted because we've been up since about 5:30 this morning.  And more apologies - cameras would have been next to impossible during our excursions due to water & general activity, therefore we have minimal photos from the day.

(It should also be mentioned that Julie realized as we were getting ready to leave to board the bus to begin our excursions that she had neglected to shave in a few days and was sporting armpits full of hair to rival any Sasquatch...which is why from here on out she will only be referred to as Sasquatch).

Sasquatch: On the bus to begin our journey, we were given the quintessential speech that would scare the hell out of us about falling out of the boat.  Additionally, we chose the more challenging course of the Royal Gorge which gave us 3-4 level rapids being all the more dangerous, so needless to say, Sasquatch scared.  I dare say, we handled ourselves very well, we didn't have any swimmers and nobody was injured.  We had a great time with our guide, Beaner (yes, Beaner, as he said he was aptly nicknamed because he was born in Mexico).  And our boatmates were an interesting bunch...

Erin:  Meathead dental students, four of them, that is the best way to describe our fellow paddlers.  Apparently dental schools have some serious gyms in them.  I learned nothing of orthodontia from our boatmates, but I know each one of their preferred bench press grips.  Beaner, our Mexican born, blonde hair, fair skinned, dread-locked guide, successfully controlled the muscle bound mouth examiners and the raft.  He did a great job of combining adventure, exercise, and a wee bit of terror as we navigated the Arkansas river.  As thanks Sasquatch, myself, and our dental friends made a solemn promise to Beaner; if we ever meet Sandra Bullock, we are to punch her in the face and kick her in the cooter.  Pass it along, for Beaner.  White water rafting was part one of a day long package.  Apparently, part of the package was a 67 mile drive to Salida, CO (rhymes with saliva) to reach the ziplining portion of the trip.  A little known fact, 'zipline' is an old Ute Indian word meaning, "to sail over canyons with wedgie".  Now I have been ziplining before, while my Sasquatch friend has not; I was not prepared for the heights and distance which I would be careening across the expanses.  I was not afraid however, I had the appropriate safety equipment.  The tiny helmet I wore would surely save me from the 1000 foot fall.

Sasquatch: After a near cowardly bail before we even filled out the release forms (you know the ones, summarizing legalese that basically says "you get hurt, you die, tough noogies, it's not our fault"), Sasquatch mustered her bravery and made the best of the situation.  Now, going back to the fact that Sasquatch is quite furry at this point, it became glaringly apparent that there was no way around not having to raise my arms above my head while our poor guides had to bury the faces near the mess to attach the necessary "don't die" equipment to the line of gliding death.  After making it successfully through the first run and allowing enough time for the violent full body shaking to subside, it wound up being a very exhilarating  experience.

Erin: And to our fortune, while waiting to begin our ziplining, we caught someone whistling a faint tune.  An ever consistent tune to our trip.  Ladies and gentlemen, again by special request, PANAMA!

So, ziplining over it became another trek across the state of Colorado through some very very terrifying mountainous areas.  Erin did a superb job white-knuckled navigating us through some of the most terrifying driving I've ever been witness to.  I'm not sure which we more afraid of - the constant flashing signs warning of moose/elk/deer (we're not sure to what they were referring), the looming wildfires around every turn, or plummeting Toonses the Driving Cat style into one of the numerous surrounding ravines.  Whose bright idea was it to put 65 MPH highways through the mountains? Too fast!

Julie: As a nod to my brother and his newly acquired profession in the tourism industry, I have a profound appreciation for the young guys and girls who work for these companies.  Thank you so much to our guides for the day.  We didn't tip them nearly enough as they helped make our day so memorable. So to Beaner, Josh, and the other guy whose name we cannot seem to remember (no matter how many google searches we perform trying fruitlessly to find out), thank you thank you thank you!  If you're ever in Colorado, we highly recommend www.raftmasters.com and www.captainzipline.com for your rafting and zipping needs!

P.S. We have successfully managed to eradicate the entire bug population in the state of Colorado with our windshield.  You're welcome.